:)

2010-01-09T06:02:00.007+08:00

Anyway my bday wish nv came true, but ended up i got something worse.
& to vanessa, today i really didn't wants thing to turn out like this too.
Apparently u came out today is to celebrate my bday, but ended up we did not even have a chat more than 10 mins in total.
I don even have a chance to at all.
I JUST REALLY JUST WAN YOU TO ACCOMPANY ME THRU MY BDAY!!!
Yet nt just came out with me, but nt talking to me.
At the steamboat, i asked u to sit beside me, but u choose to sit with others, happily.
I didn't blame u for all those.
The tiff started when i asked u out to smoke, but the way u talk to me and the others is so different!!!!
It's like i have done something today that make u talk to me like this?
Anyway, on wed i did mention that if u are not tonning, i won be tonning.
& there are nt any threaten at my words when outside the steamboat, i just felt disappointed. I"m just trying to psycho you to ton, but yet u ended up in such a big anger.
I knew my words are kind of harsh at that moment, but have u tot about the way u treat me to others is so much different?
Is just like, whateva i did for you, u would just take it as I'm trying to make u angry, u nv gave me chance.
Don u think that, when i talk to u and other talk to u, u react differently.
U ARE JUDGING ME!
A quot from the bible " IF U START JUDGING THE PERSON, YOU ALREADY STOP KNOWING THEM"!
I swear everything i done for you, are not going against you, I'm just trying to shown concern.
I'm Just trying to get near to you, That all.
Anyway wheneva we have a tiff, we both are stubborn people.
We always tot that each other are right, but alway after i reflected on it, i knew i'm wrong, i would try to mend it.
So many promises " I will change for you, i will nv quarrel with you, i will nv break up with you" This 3 promises are the most important, but yet.....
I always Did treasure you, if i do not, all those thing u done to me, would i still be continuing courting you, trying to get me back?
You nv gave me a chance again!
Since christmas quarrel, u wanted ur freedom i gave you, what ever u wanted that reasonable or not, i tried to give you.
Cause I'm afraid that i would lose you, but ended up, when i let loose on new year, letting u out with ur frens?

What happen? U left me alone!
Anyway, i did not ask u to go aside, Its dexter.
When u walk to a side, i knew u would simply go home, that why i chase around, finding you.
Risking myself, yet?
There no outcome.
Vanessa, you new i felt for you.
Please give me a chance to talk to you ltr on.
I won be sleeping, pls give me a text when u are awake.
I truly love you, Vanessa chee.
It's from my bottom of my heart.
& i swear whatever i did, i really not out to spike you, I'm just trying to show concern.
I apologies for whatever i did unintentionally that hurts or angered you.
I'm thankful for all those things you done for me so far, leaving me a deep memory of those past 8months we are tgt.
Time really fly, 8 months & it over, it just like a flash, everything it just like happen weeks ago.
How i wish we are like ours first few months, one word sweet.
You left a deep scar on me.
You are the one i fell in love so deep before, you are the one i did many things i nv done to others before.
But everything isit too late?
Sighs.
Vanessa, wo zhen de shi ai ni de.
Qing ni yuan liang wo.
I cant even sleep at this moment, my whole mind is full of you.

2010-01-01T08:22:00.002+08:00

Such a new year gift. :(
Vanessa, i shall keep it short & simple.
I do love you.
I really wanna u to be happy just nw, that why i did nt force u to meet me.
Im afraid, u would say "I cant even celebrate with my fren & u cant give me freedom"
That tt reason, why i nv wanted to call u th 2nd time.
Anyway, its my wishful thinking.
Hope u are having a good dream, w/o me maybe u are happier?
But i really do wanna have u back.
Because of three words eight letter, I LOVE YOU.

2009-12-31T00:15:00.003+08:00

Every since you wanted your freedom, i felt the gab btw us has been getting bigger.
I know i neglected you when I'm working, i apologise.
But when I'm home, you still continued chatting with your friend, our only time able to chat tgt.
Anyway, you have an early night, hope to cya tmr.
I don even know whether u wanna spend new year with me or your friends. :(
Night & sweet dream.
<3

I'm off to sleep.
Practical test tmr.

No one to turn to.

2009-12-20T23:59:00.004+08:00

It been so long since i last blog.
Maybe i have really no one to turn to be my listening ear.
Anyway just ended work at Farrer Park, what a tiring day.

I cant even said it all to you!!!
We had been thru 7 months, so many ups and downs and our 8 months is just round the corner, 8 more days.
Maybe I'm the always the guy, whom you said "A bad boyfriend".
Is that so? Can you tell me?
Can you don always keep things in your mind?
I really wanna be a good listening ear, a caring boyfriend, a guy whom you could always turn to.
Maybe all those controlling i done is overboard, but i really need you, I'm afraid.
It's not about there no mutual trust on you, but you never gave me a assurance before.
I'm worried, I'm worried.
Letting you out with guys, I'm worried of loosing you, I'm afraid you will leave.
I knew you ask me times & times letting you out, but I'm afraid.
I'm remorseful & sorry about my selfishness.
I always tot that what i have done for you, you would do back the same.
I'm too naive.
All i ever wanted was just a beautiful, sweet & memorable relationship.
If i would to have these, I'm contented.
I love you too much, i just cant afford to loose you, that the reason why i have done these.
I'm truly sorry.
Maybe it true that you are happier with your friends.
All those promises, never leave me, never quarrel with me, will change for the better.
Day by day I'm still waiting for it to be true, but...
No matter how hard the road in front gonna to be, i would hold on, just hopping you & I could cross it together.

It's been the whole day you have gave me attitudes, mood swing & cold shoulder. Early in the morning i woke you up, I'm at fault, but I'm worried of all those words you said. I felt so threaten by you, w/o your freedom you are gonna move on w/o me. After all the tiffs in the morning, you have been giving cold shoulders. You went out with them, without even giving me a slightest notice. If i never called, maybe i would be a fking idiot been keeping in the dark. I never thot you would be going as you said ytd nigh "I will stay at home, i told them i would not be going". But in the end you went w/o even telling me, until i called. In the call, i receive your scolding, your attitude w/o any reasons. It hurts! One girlfriend went out with guys, w/o telling & ended getting yelled. The pain you will never imagine. What more, u hung my call, refused to answer & reply my text. No matter how upset am I, but I'm glad that you are enjoying yourself. U seem to be a changed person over night, your personality and action changed dramatically.
You also said "Darling, don't ever leave you, love me more, i don wanna see you sad". Everything, came out differently.
I really needs you. You are my everything i cant loose you, I do love you lots. I just wish we could one day sit down & speak out our misunderstanding & differences & things we need to change for each others.
I really do love you Vanessa!

Off to bed, I'm exhausted physically & mentally.
Having work later on, hopping it would be a better day when the sun rises.
Nights Nights.

2009-11-20T23:41:00.006+08:00

Hai! Im helping this loser update his blog cause im angry at him right nao. He's currently over at jianting's house[i think] playing mahjong, neglecting me. AlvinLow, i swear im gonna kick your balls tmrw or when i meet you. And dont blame me if i start neglecting you >:!!

2009-10-30T00:28:00.002+08:00

It been days seen i last blog.
I know alot people miss me :x
Today woke up 11plus, fetch her after sch followed by sending her home.
Met tristan & junjie & off to WWW.
Played till 6 plus & had dinner at just acia.
Junj & Tris left after that, I and her went to kovan to meet up with dex & yijie.
Talk cock & slack till 11 plus, send her home.
I'm going in to NS soon, it less than 2months. :(
BOTAK & NO FREEDOM.

Happy 6th month darling, love vanessa alot. :)

2009-10-21T23:51:00.004+08:00

in chalet now :o

2009-10-16T00:56:00.001+08:00

That it, time & time again, you choose not to trust me.
You doubt me.
That it.

2009-10-12T18:41:00.000+08:00

2009-10-09T17:34:00.002+08:00

HELLOS PEEPS.
I'm so lazy to blog ah & don have pic to post, SOOOOO, i did not blog for so long.
Nothing much happen this few days.
Hmmm, ltr should be gng dwn to kovan find Gerald & clique to slack.
It been so many hours since she last text me, where is she?
Off to prepare.
BYEEE.

2009-09-27T23:54:00.005+08:00

hello, vanessa here. im pitying alvin, so im helping him to blogg.

sat,
alvin went to work till very latee,
then after work he went home to bathe,
then came down to meeet us.

sun,
went to hougang mall for dinner with me, yijie and junjie.
afterthat bought more foood then went to slack awhile.
headed over to arcade and they played carcar. t
hen alvin sendd mee home at 11pm, then he train homee.

2009-09-25T00:17:00.002+08:00

Heyyos peeps,
been days since i last blogged.
Wed, chalet day.
Woke up at 11 in the morning, prepared and bus dwn to ave to meet Gerald.
Brought cigg & bus dwn to fetch vanessa after sch.
Blah Blah Blah, than met up with Des they all & dwn to chalet.
Clean, prepare and etc.
Charcoal arrive at 8 plus, start BBQ.
9 plus she went home, send her to inter and back to chalet.

Thurs.
Blackjack thru the nigh than went changi village to have breakfast.
Back to chalet, bath and slept at 7am.
Woke up at 12 plus, cook and slack around in the kitchen.
Than bbq at 5 plus and slack til next day morning.

Friday.
Went dwn early in the morning to find vanessa, as she said she will nt be attending school.
Bus to my hse, slept till 4 plus.
Prepare and went to Tam to meet up with yj & grp.
Had cafe cartel for dinner.
Slack and bus dwn to sng at 10.
Slack and send her hm.

Now days I'm so lazy to post & don have pic. :(
Bye peeps.

2009-09-22T00:39:00.002+08:00

Hello peoples,
I'm home, today went out at 3 plus.
Met vanessa at heartland after that met up with des & gerald.
Some tiff, shall nt mention.
Met her up again at around 7, than went to sheng siong.
Slack & send her home at 9 plus.
When back to find gerald & grp.
Unload things & went to buy cigg.
Gerald send me home, he is a road chi.
Turn round & round before reaching my hse. LOLS.
Going to sleep soon.
Nighs people. :)

After so much we up tgt again. Really hope there no more quarrel & we give in to each other. We must do our part to maintain this relationship.
I love you Vanessa.

2009-09-20T23:51:00.003+08:00

Today, woke from morning till 4plus.
Than met her & went to bugis with her and dex, tris.
Follow by Fab.
Home at 11plus.

Seriously, I'm really getting force till no where i could talk anymore. It just like, i got all those attitude, wheneva u had moodswings. I just bare, trying to cheer u up, concern you, even i could suggest that when I'm sick, i go over find you. What more do u expect u tell me? If u could name out anything i had not done, I'm speechless than. When I'm sick, what concern do i get? CAN U SIMPLY TELL ME WHAT I HAD DONE WRONG?
I'm really at wits end, i felt so pressurize wheneva u at this kind of status, paranoid, finding solution. Yet ended up i was said to be a no heart person. Disappointing!
I always told you, i just want a simple and sweet relationship, no quarrels. You always promised me yes you will do so, but yet always i getting all those disappointing answ, but i just bare with it, cause i love you. What could i do? What choice do i left with? Forgive & forget that what i always do. Yet, all those are still happening.
Two days ago, you promised me the last time that you would not get angry over small thing, would not throw anger at me, would not accuse me.
BUT YET!!
Shall not talk about it anymore, the more i think about it, the more hurt & disappointed.
Last thing i could say is, I'm true to you & i do love and miss you, vanessa.

2009-09-20T00:51:00.002+08:00

Hello peeps!
Ytd went to amk to have movie with vanessa.
We Watched alien in the alttics.
After that went to find Tristan, ltr on Richard came dwn.
Home at 11plus, she came my hse.

Today, slack whole day at my hse, after that went to to find fabian & friends.
Shop, Slack, eat than walk to parklane to take bus to funeral.
Miss the bus & cabbed dwn.
Left at 10, went to sng & slack with her till last bus.
Home at 11plus.
Gonna sleep early, tmr have workkk :(
NIGHTY PEEPS.

Day By Day.

2009-09-18T00:53:00.019+08:00

Homee from dinner.
been day since i last blog, was dam lazy.
nothing much to say and so moodless. :(
Some pics of the past few days above.

I'm really speechless, it just because of dota, you can shout, get angry at me.
Why must u do so? It my only past time for me, i never because of dota, i PS-ed you, don wanna come out, don wanna entertain you.
I can just alt-QQ for you.
Why must u have pian jian against it?
U commented guys, i can even just close one eye about it, compare to the above, what that compare to this.
I close an eye, was just to avoid all possible of quarrel, yet because of that, u could said all those.
Shall not mention those.
Pleaseeee, i really love you, the sight the u are angry, mood less it really killing me, it such pain.
I'm trying all ways just to avoid quarrels with you, cant u do a part?
Day by day i felt so climb over, you are the one only could get angry at me, i have no rights anymore, even how angry am i, i bare with it, cause if i let out my anger, ending of it u would get angry at me.
I felt that i do not have anymore right to get angry at you, only u could.
Whenever, u are moody, angry, i will always try to cheer you up, NT neglecting you, only hope is you would cheer up and smile again. I don mean anything.
U said, u will change for me, u will understand me, u would stop yelling at me, stop Ur hurting words, but somehow history repeat itself.
I trust u once and once again, because i believe u still love me & i love you a lot.
Dearest Vanessa pleaseeeee. :(
ILY VANESSA.
Sorry for always being demanding, forcing, i sometime really lost control and cant help it.
You are really too important to me, w/o a sight of u i start missing you, start getting paranoid.
Sorry my dear, i really will try my best not to do it, i will change.
We both must do our part to keep this relationship going, i don wanna it to be left with a one sided part. NO NO.
Yours words spilled at me, hurt hurt hurt, it just like a knife piercing into my heart, tremendous pain, OUCH.
Nothing could hurt more than that. My dear, would you be alright?
Would you forgive me?
I really wan the old you, to be with u happily, not spilling all those hurting words, not get angry at me at small reason, be more understanding and the old cheerful self?
I'm trying to be a good bf, a one could understand you, to be your listening ear, to pamper you, to be by your side always, to love you whole heartily, to take care and your dearest.
My only hopes that u would change and be your old cheerful self, i would be contented.
My dear Vanessa, my love for you would never change, i swear, nothing may be forever, but my love for u would last as long as possible, till the end of the world.
You make a impact in my life, u make me realized what true love, u make me learn how to love a person and u became the most important person in my life. Nothing else could compare your importance.
Tears & Tears & Tears are rolling down.
Take care of you yourself, drink more water please. :)

2009-09-14T13:06:00.005+08:00

Morninggg.
Finally It show end, ytd worked from 10am to next day morning 5plus am.
What a tiring day & my body hurts.
End work than cab hm, bath and sleep. I woke up early just wanna meet u later, was planning to fetch u after sch, but something happen.

Shall nt mention further. It been a day we had not met up, that the reason why i wanna meet you. U plan everything w/o telling me, my first reaction was stunt, like wtf luh. I know u have your good reason for not texting me up, but u should know after I'm awake, my first thing is wanna meet up. Cause I Miss You.

Should i say I'm use to it? It's like, if i don talk so nicely, what would be the ending? i guess u would flare up again. I'm nt accusing you, but that what i felt, if this sentence offended you, I'm Sorry.
Comment more guys!!

2009-09-13T18:55:00.009+08:00

Hai! vanessa here againz. ytd's post was also from me okay.
because alvin is fat and lazy,
he asked me to blog for him, so i shall be nice and blog.

Today, he woke up at 9am, went to bathe.
on his computer for awhile, blast music, then headed to work.

and now he's working at suntec,
and i bet he's eyeing on girls there:x
just joking okay, i'll gorge out his eyes if he does that.

anw, today is his last day of work, he should be happy.
cause he can meet me tomorrow, ahahaha.

i shall help him reply some of his tags!
amelis- cause you sxck, hahahaa. fat amelis.
xiaorong- fxck you, he's still working now, hahaha.

2009-09-13T00:45:00.006+08:00

fri, work work work. after work go home, sleep wake up go work.

sat, work work work. after work vanessa and tristan came and find me. went to pei tristangohwenliang eat then went to smoke smoke then went homeeeee.

tomorrow will be working too,

FIND ME AT COMEX IT SHOW:B

It all falling dwn on me.

2009-09-11T09:32:00.003+08:00

Hello good morning peeps. :)
IM OFFFF TO WORRKKK!
Shall blog ltr when i am home.

I really do not why are u doing this? Do i deserved to be treat like this? Your actions your words, it killing me. Whateva i done, it don't seem to please you, it just like all my fault. When i am whits end with other matter, more & more came out. Sighs. I am not blaming you or what so ever, just wanna u be back to your normal self. I'm tired, very tired, i can't take it already.
And it not i wanted to purposely fell asleep, i left the phone on the table, plus I'm super tired.

2009-09-10T23:08:00.007+08:00

Heyo peeps,
I am back from work.
Ytd night she came over to find me & brought cotton candy for me. :)
Slacked at my hse dwnstair till 11plus and up to my hse.
Turn off immediately after using com, TIRED!
Woke up at 9am, prepared and off to work.
Reached at 10, saw alot of familiar faces, have some talk about the past.
Things happened really fast, last year was just like weeks ago, we all changed alot. Lots say i changed alot, did I?
I injured my leg, bruised, OUCH.
Work till 10, dad fetch me home.
What a tiring day & I'm Famish, whole day haven grab a bite.
Off to sleep soon, 3 more days to go.
Nights peoplee!

So much things happen recently, it too sudden, i do not know how much longer could i take it. Firstly, today had some conflict with her. Things u said, really hurt me, all those words it may be anger words, but it cut deeply in my heart. I really don wanna quarrel with you, i just onli wanna meet up with you, dont u know how much i miss you? I mean nothing my dear, a simple glance or a few mins meet up and i would be contented. I really love you a lot, don wanna lose you, i cherish you, i need you. i hope u feel the same. :( Shall nt mention this anymore, just hope that u would be your normal self.
Next tues going to report to HQ with my dad. I donno how should how i mention this thing to him. Im so fking stress up. Helppp!!
& i been busy finding work, yet fruitless. Sighs.
Just too much stressssssssss. :(

Just hope you understand me & not be angry.
i love you vanessa. :(

2009-09-09T13:46:00.005+08:00

annyeonghasaeyo, vanessa here.
im here to help this fat person post^^

so ytd, after jianting went his house, he went down to amk and met me and his friends. arcaded and then went to eat. watched Gforce 3D. after movieee slacked awhile then went my house downstairs slack awhile then home at 1030pm^^

and now this idiot is currently working.

2009-09-08T13:33:00.003+08:00

Monday,
woke up at 12 plus in the noon. Woke her up, prepared at went to town.
Hunt for her jacket, after and hour finally found a nt bad looking one at fareast.
Walked to taka to have dinner.
We had Udon, Tako Ball, Tori-Q, Durian pancake, donuts, Dairy queen ice cream & Yammi yogurt for dinner. -.-
Fking bloated, walk to smoke, saw calvin & weiquan, such coincidence.
We like walk for half hour to find the 162 bus stop.
Bus dwn, reach amk at around 7.30.
Walked around and had durian pancake again.
Slack and vanessa send me home at 10pm.
Dota till 3 plus & off to lalaland.

I am like so stress up with lots of thing, everyday swirling in my mind. Things like her, bike, job, money & army.
Sighs, i really need someone to enlighten and help me. Any kind soul out there?
Thanks vanessa for your concerned, i felt much better.

Today,
Knn, i cannot off my alarm clock, it like ring for an hour. Dam piss till i took out the battery.
Woke up at 12plus, called her, she said she studying & nt gng zoo le. -.-
AND I HAVE FEVER RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT. :(
Jianting coming find me, maybe going fishing ltr.
Shall post again in the nigh.
bye people.

2009-09-07T12:21:00.002+08:00

Sunday,
Woke at 10 plus, send her to bus stop, than went home to rest.
woke up around 1, prepared and went dwn to 107.
Help out for the dinner preparation. only ck and fab at there.
ltr on yuhong & cai came dwn.
SERVE, SERVE & SERVE. Not even have my dinner.
help out around 11 plus, send her home.
Reach home at 12.
After my bath, Des, smart, hong came over to fetch me to marina barrage.
Guess wha t, we went there to fly kite. -.-
Left there at 3, drove to my hse prata to have supper.
Slack till 4 plus & home.
Shall post again went im home, going to town with her.

Ytd, as i expected, u will not show up. I been thinking whether will u be dwn on sun since sat. Yet, i got my disappointing answ from you. IS FRIEND MORE IMPORTANT THAN OUR OWN SIDE DINNER? Can u fking give me a EXPLANATION. I hlp u once, twice, what i got back? Disappointment & other back stabbing me. U are such a let down! I don wanna to phrase everything until so nan ting, what my mind been thinking, really let me look down on you. I can read ur mind, i know what your intentions for going to her birthday. I know, but i just don wanna make it sound so nan ting.

2009-09-06T11:22:00.002+08:00

SAT,
Morning woke at 7, prepare for work.
Someone delayed my time, ending up i took cab to work. Haven start work, lose 12 dollar already.
Met up the rest at yishun, took lorry to our designated location.
Work, work work, till 4 plus pm, lorry back to yishun.
Some hlp out & cab back to sng mrt.
Reach home around 7, prepare, eat and went to Dhouby to find her.
Met up with her. Saw lots of familiar faces, it been a long time since i saw them.
Had dinner at BurgerKing.
Met up with yijie next, his motive for coming was to see GIRLS. -.-
Slacked, accompanied yijie to centerpoint.
Had Macflury mix & max, cool right? & double choc.
Walked back to dhouby and mrt homed.
She came to my hse, slp after she blog.
Shall post Again when im home from dinner at 107.

2009-09-04T23:26:00.002+08:00

Woke up at 9.30, because of morning call from her, prepare everything went dwn to 105.
Reached there, i was like the only person who reach luh, follow by dex. yj, hong & cai came dwn.
After all those crap prayers at 12, fetch her from sch.
Went back and have those prayers again. -.-
Done all those preparation, vanessa chee went dwn to find me again, at 3 plus.
Walk to dex hse bath & went back to 105.
DINNER! (: & some hlping out.
Left around 9 to HG mall to buy a stupid choc cone, what a waste of time.
Mrt home at 10 plus.
Im so stress about hw i blog, cause of someone sitting beside me.
Gotta slp early, work tmr.
Anw, i love vanessa. =)

2009-09-04T00:49:00.003+08:00

Hello good morning!
woke at 12plus pm.
rotted at home while waiting for her to come, she like took forever to come.
She reach my hse at 4 plus, off to garden to have flolicks and shaker fries.
Bus dwn to kovan, met dex, yj & junjie.
went up hong hse met the rest & bus dwn to hg for dinner.
Drank with yijie at dinner, cab dwn to funeral.
After funeral cab back to hg.
Home at 10plus. :)

2009-09-02T23:26:00.004+08:00

woke at 10plus thank to someone.
when dwn to sng to meet her at 3 plus, wait for tristan.
Accompany tris dye hair at 107.
met dex & yuhong ltr on at kovan, dwn to kallang bahru.
after dinner at kallang bahru, cab dwn to hougang songka.
Slack awhile, send her home at 10 plus.
home at last.

Seriously, if u don feel like gng or whateva, can just simply tell me?
Some more LIE to me 2 times, u think im a kid?
I think telling me the TRUTH would be better than lying to me.
Im angry at u, because u lied to me & not that u did nt came down.
Get your PRIORITY right!
Hope u honor ur promise that u would be coming on 4th and 6th.
I'm FUCKING DISAPPOINTED at you.

2009-08-31T23:53:00.000+08:00

Under construction.

alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
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alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
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alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.
alvin loves vanessa.